The Unexplainable

It's been a while, but I feel the need to blog today! Even as I start this, I don't have any idea what I am going to say. But I have learned that when the Spirit is nudging me to do something, I should do it! There are always blessings that we risk missing when we don't obey!

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Life is hard somedays, who am I kidding... Life is hard MOST days!! Things don't turn out like we hoped. We live in a world broken by sin. It causes sickness, heartache, disappointment, insecurity, death, bankruptcy, etc... the list is truly limitless!  So how can we thrive and succeed in a world like this? Actually, forget thriving, most days we wonder how we can manage to survive today? Our country seems to be headed in a direction that is far from God and it's scary! Our economy is horrible, and most of us are just one missed paycheck away from losing everything!  How do we get past all of that and live a fulfilling, thriving life?

The situations in my life have forced me to evaluate this over the past few months. God has stretched me in painful, yet beautiful ways! Wait, "Painful and beautiful"...... How can that be? Life is complicated and therefore cannot be viewed or comprehended in one dimension. So what may appear painful and ugly on the surface can be a beautiful blessing if viewed from another angle.  

If we refuse to wallow in our circumstances and we decide to keep our eyes focused on Christ, we will see life in a whole different perspective. 

Let me give an example of what I mean:

For years I have dreamed of a new house. There's nothing wrong with mine.  It has met all my needs wonderfully for the past 8 years and never caused us any problems.  But by all worldly standards, its a "starter home". My husband and I bought it when we were 20, engaged, child-free, and it was more than I could have dreamed of then. But now is a different story.... it so easy to forget all of the good things about it and just see that it is a townhouse with no garage (which I particularly hate when I have to start my car at 4am in the freezing cold), no yard for my daughter and dog to play in, absolutely no storage, etc....

Every year as I decorate for Christmas, I can't help but hope that it will be my last year decorating that house!  I dream that I will someday have a house with a front porch I can decorate to the nines, a big staircase with a banister that has beautiful garland and Christmas lights sprawling down it, and a HUGE Christmas tree in my large 2-story foyer!!  Then I look around at my reality - a messy, cluttered house that I never have time to clean and that feels like it's about to burst at the seams. I shed a few tears and get angry that Jere and I both work so hard, and have sacrificed so much to follow the dream God has given us, and yet my dreams of a new house (and the free time to actually clean it) aren't anywhere close to being my reality.  

Or are they.... How do I really know what God has in store for me??? Let's be honest, I don't even know what He has planned for this afternoon..... so why do I place Him in a box and say that my dreams can't be reality! Now, I am not trying to say that God gives us every dream if we want it badly enough.... that's ridiculous! But the bible clearly says in Psalm 37:4 that if we "Take delight in the Lord, He will give us the desires of our heart".  

Dig a little deeper that doesn't say God always gives us the desires of our heart, but if we "Take Delight in Him"... align our heart with His... desire to see His will done. If we are able to do that then the desires of our heart will be the same as the desires of His heart! Instead of focusing on how we can achieve our dreams, we should focus on how we can change our dreams to match the dreams God has for us! 

I recently watched this video published by LCBC Church. (It's long, but I encourage you to watch it when you are done reading this.) It's a story of an incredible miracle in the life of a young family. It is truly amazing and even though their story may seem completely unrelated to what I'm talking about, the one thing they said stood out so significantly to me. While being faced with an incredibly difficult situation, they chose to stay faithful to God and pray for the UNEXPLAINABLE!!! That is so powerful! They chose not to wallow in their horrific circumstances, but to focus on God's limitless power! 

I was so inspired by this and I realized that my situations are soooo petty compared to what they were facing. And that I am so ungrateful for the countless blessing I have because I am so focused on the one that I don't have! I have decided to pray each and every day for God to do the UNEXPLAINABLE in my life! Regardless of what He decides to do with my life, whether I ever get that dream house or not, I want the circumstances of my life to be "Unexplainable" - that No One can take credit for it except God! 

So if I really believe God can do the Unexplainable, then I need to have faith that He will do amazing things in and through my life! I need to remember that truly thriving in this life means dedicating my life to Him! It has nothing to do with a house, a car, or anything else that society tries to tell us we should have. We need to spend each and every day trying to live as Christ did!

I won't always make the right choices, and I'm sure I still have a few pity parties to come! But I will never give up the fight, because Christ will NEVER give up on me!!! And His plans are so much more beautiful and amazing than we can ever comprehend!! So whatever your dream is, whatever causes you to want to throw a pity party for yourself, remember that God knows the desires of your heart! Trust in Him!!! When we align ourselves with Him, His desires become our desires and we begin to recognize the immeasurable amount of UNEXPLAINABLE blessings He has placed in front of us!!!

Waiting.....

Do you have that one burning desire in your heart? Or maybe it's more than one....

Society tells us that we "Make our own path" or to "Go get our dreams"! The problem with this is that when we take our future into our own hands we are putting control into our imperfect and clumsy hands. We try to take the control from the one who already has it figured out. He already has our future worked out exactly as He sees best! And when I look around at the beauty of nature and the wonderful things He is capable of, I want to get nothing short of His best!!!

I know sometimes (for me anyway) my dreams seem to be burning a whole in my heart and it's sooo painful to just wait on His timing! But we have to realize that He already has it figured out and He desires for me to have what is best for me!  His word tells us that He will not hold back and He will never give me less than His best for me!

It's so easy to miss the good things that are going on in our life right now when we are too concerned with getting to where our dream is! 

I am living this right now! We just opened a business and you would think that I would be living the dream. But this business was a result of God telling us to trust Him and follow blindly! It is not in any way my passion or my dream. Please don't get me wrong, I am so grateful for the opportunity God has given me to spread His word through our new business. But it is my husband's passion and he is so good at it.  Unfortunately, we still have to pay our bills, which means he has to keep his teaching job for now. So I am left to run the business most of the time. There are many aspects of the "business side" of it that I love. But there are so many areas of it that cause me to feel inadequate and unworthy of being there. It is a constant battle and when I focus on it gets me down or it can draw me so much closer to my Saviour, if I choose to let it!

God has given me a very different passion and for now, I don't know what He has planned.  He may bring it to be later in life, or He may slowly change my dreams to be in line with His. But one thing I do know is when I focus on all of the things I want to be doing, that aren't happening right now, I miss the blessings He has given me right now!

I pray He opens each of your eyes to see the great things He has placed in your life at the present time! Regardless of what your circumstances are, He has a reason for you to be exactly where you are! Trust Him and He will reveal His purpose and His ultimate plan in His timing!!!

Dirty Little Secrets

Why do we feel the need to keep certain parts of ourselves hidden? Why do we think that we won't be accepted if other people knew our true selves?

The truth every single person I have ever talked to is hiding something. Not a single person on this earth has it all together? We all struggle with certain things. 

Imagine with me for just a minute... What would this world look like if we would all just let our flaws hang out for the world to see? Think about it, if you and I would just be honest about what we are struggling with, how many people do we know that may have already been where we are? How many of our friends and family could help us deal with our problems? How many people could we help go through something we have already been through - if only we could be honest!! If only we could put our fears of rejection and shame aside!! What kind of world would it be?

When we keep our problems a secret from others, it's so easy to lose our perspective. They can seem so much bigger than they really are. And they can weigh us down and keep us from enjoying life.

Through this blog, I am committing to share my problems, concerns, and struggles. I am hoping you are willing to do the same. Life is much easier when we do it together! So let's commit to being there for each other and stop worrying about what others will think of us! Instead, let's focus on how we can help others who may be struggling with the same thing!!

Even if you only tell one person one little secret you've been keeping, it's a good place to start! Don't you think?

Lessening the "Frazzle" in my Life

I'm just like any other busy mom/wife who rushes home each day and struggles to find the time to cook, clean, do dishes, laundry, and still have quality time with my family! So in an effort to make life a little easier and free up some time through the week, I've decided to try my first attempt at "freezer cooking".

I've often thought about trying it, but we don't have an extra deep freeze at our house and since we don't have a garage or basement, I really don't have anywhere to put one. So I've always just decided it wasn't for me. But since life has blown up lately and gotten even busier than normal, I decided it's time to give it a try!  Due to my lack of space, I am only going to make enough meals for one week.

So early this morning, armed with my pen and notebook, I scoured Pinterest and came up with a few meals that I want to make this week.  It's actually a combination of some meals we already know we like and some new ones! (It's never good to try a whole week of new meals... I want to know I have at least one my family will like!)

It was harder than I expected to narrow down the list of what to make. Keeping my limited budget in mind, I wanted to find something that I could make without having to buy hundreds of dollars in ingredients.

Here is what I came up with for this week:

Black Bean Taco Soup

Baked Ziti

Spinach Lasagna Rolls (I'm going to adapt it and serve it with my favorite seasoned chicken breasts!)

Frozen Pizzas (But I'm going to use whole wheat flour instead).

Chicken and Rice (My own "at-home" hibachi....) **This is our family's favorite meal! We LOVE our local Hibachi restaurant, Aki. But since it's not friendly on the wallet or the waistline, I played around for a while and figured out the perfect alternative to make at home! I'll share the recipe later!!  I've never tried freezing it, but I think it will work just fine.

Breakfast Sandwiches (On English Muffins) - Because I leave the house by 4:30am and Jerry drags Miah out the door to take her to her Grandma's by 6:45am... so we ALWAYS have to do breakfast on the run!!

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So Sunday afternoon, I will sit down and start my afternoon of baking! Here's to hoping Miah is in a mood to help!! :)

But today, after work, we are off to the local Amish-run discount grocery store to try and score some deals on some of the items on our list.  Then a quick trip to Food Lion to pick up the rest of the items on the list!!

I'll post on Monday with results of how it turned out!!! But for now, please share your experiences with freezer cooking!  What are some of your favorite recipes??

Digging out of your Mess

I saw something a few weeks ago (Yes, on Pinterest....) that has really helped bring me through some tough times in my life right now:

Think about it....

This applies to every single person's life at some point. We ALL have something that we have made a mess of in our lives. And sometimes it isn't even something we could control. Sometimes, the mess just finds us!

That's hard for me to grasp sometimes... I look around at the areas of my life that are a complete and utter mess and I feel like I need to find a reason. Something or someone to blame for it. Normally, I end up blaming myself.  

Most of my "Mess" right now is financial and it's so easy for me to beat myself up over what I should have done (or not done). But the truth is, while there were things I could have done better, I was truly listening and following God's will in many of my decisions.  Sometimes its hard to just accept that he wants me to be in this place at this time. I long for times when I don't have issues paying my bills and I can afford to do things that I so desperately want to do. For example, more than anything, I want to be able to afford to take my daughter on a Disney Cruise. And I can choose to focus on that and be upset that I'm not able to do that right now. Or I can choose to recognize that my Heavenly Father knows the desires of my heart and if it's possible for me to be in his will and still be able to do those things, he will allow them to happen... in His timing!!

All that I can do is wait and trust in my God!

It is not always easy, but I am realizing that regardless of how horrible my current "mess" is, it has strengthened my marriage tremendously (You can read more about that here), but even more importantly it has strengthened our faith in the Lord!  Both Jerry and I are able to see God move in ways we had only read about in stories.  

When we were first opening the gym a few months ago, I found this image below and I prayed that God would make it true in my life! And He has done exactly that!

If we didn't have times of trouble, would we even rely on God for anything? Or would we be comfortable where we are in life and be content just knowing He exists!?  God desires for us to know him intimately - He is after all....

our Creator 

our Savior

our Father

our Comforter

our Everything!!

It's time we put our trust in the one who knows us so intimately that he even knows the number of hairs on our head.  He is Infinitely Good!!

So next time you start to feel worn down, frustrated, or just tired of waiting for this mess to pass..... remember that God has you in this place and time for a reason and He has a plan to turn your mess into an amazing message if you just left him!!!

A True Domestic Goddess

This morning I sat down and started to write a blog post about being a domestic goddess.... emphasizing how we all strive to be the perfect wife, mother, housekeeper, etc.  But I stopped home for just a brief second in between working the gym and going to show houses and as I walked in my door, I wanted to cry! It smelled like dog, there was visible dust on my dining room floor, the dirty dishes were overflowing my sink and beginning to take over the countertop, there were toys everywhere, and the blankets and pillows from last night's family movie night were still scattered across the living room. I had a sudden rush of emotions flash before me.  I felt like a hypocrite and a failure.  I grabbed what I needed off the cluttered kitchen counter, pushed the dog back with my leg so he wouldn't run out the door and rushed off to my next appointment!  A few hours later, I pulled in the driveway and took a deep breath... I was dreading walking back into my mess of a house! (When things are falling apart at home, it's so easy to find reasons to stay away and escape it.)  But I finally gathered myself together and walked toward the door. As I opened the door, I suddenly had tears fill my eyes!! There was my husband vacuuming the stairs.... the table and counter were both perfectly clean and free of clutter, the dishes had been done, the laundry had been put away, the toys were cleaned up, the dining room floor was free of dust and dog hair, and the aroma of my favorite candles filled the air!

I am not telling you this to make you wish your husband had done the same thing for you today.... in fact that is the opposite of what I am trying to do.

Let me take you back to this time last year (even 6 months ago....). My husband and I have nothing in common, really. We spent the last few years of our marriage wondering why we were even putting up with each other. We fought every day! We never did anything together.... just lived our separate lives and maybe tolerated each other a few minutes a day when we were in public.. to keep up appearances! I really think the only reason I wasn't ready to give up on things was because I would have been embarrassed of how it would make me look. I feel horrible even saying that because I look at my husband now and can't imagine that I ever felt that way!  He is the most incredible gift from God and I am so ashamed that I ever lost sight of that.

I wouldn't have said this at the time, but looking back I realize how selfish I was being. And I know he feels the same. We were each focused more on what we were getting from our marriage than what we were giving to our marriage.  It was so easy to see a post on facebook where someone mentioned something nice their spouse did for them, and wish my spouse did that for me! That would harbor feelings of envy and anger toward toward him and was killing my marriage!

Opening the gym forced us to take a step of faith. We each began to work on our relationship with God and very soon we realized how different our relationship with each other had become.  When we put our focus on the Lord, we began to see each other in a different way! I remembered all the reasons I fell in love with my husband! And as a result, we realized that weeks had gone by and we hadn't fought about a single thing! I now look forward to and treasure the time that I have with my husband!  The transformation that happened in just a few months is truly a miracle!

So when I say that I came home today to a clean house, it is no way to brag about him or make anyone envious. It is to make you realize that when God is the center of your marriage, you are able to be more attentive to each other than you ever thought possible. By staying in constant communication with our Lord and spending time together each day doing devotions, we realize just how blessed we truly are!

My prayer is that each and every person reading this is able to take something away to improve their marriage. I realized that I can strive all day to be a domestic goddess... but a true domestic goddess isn't about having the perfect clean house, home-cooked dinner, perfect children, or having completed all the perfect Pinterest crafts. It's about being a wife who prays for and with her husband and trusts in her Savior to provide all of her family's needs!

Why "Christianity" pisses me off!!!

I saw something on Pinterest this afternoon that really made me stop and think. Yes, I admit I am a Pinterest addict. But I do legitimately put many of my "pins" to good use, so I feel that justifies my addiction... Sort of!)

Anyway..... This is one of the things I saw today that got me thinking so deeply that I decided to write a whole blog post about it:

Can I tell you just how much I LOVE this!?!  Those who know me well know that modern day Christianity makes me so angry! I can't speak for God and I certainly don't want to put words in his mouth. But when I read through the bible and study all of the things Jesus was teaching his followers, I can only help but wonder if he would be furious with us for the image of Him that we have portrayed!

For example, how did Jesus respond In John 8, when the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery and threw her down at his feet? They questioned Jesus as to whether he agreed with them that she should be stoned to death, as the law required. And what did Jesus say to them? “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” All the accusers eventually walked away in shame. And when Jesus was the only one left, he said to her, “Where are your accusers, does no one condemn you?” She replied (terrified and humiliated, I'm sure), “No one, Lord.” Jesus answered her with the most amazing words imaginable, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on, sin no more.”

Isn't that story simply incredible!? It gives me goosebumps!! Isn't it just like so many Christians today to catch this woman in the midst of her mistake and then try to make an example of her? Put her sins on display, all the while trying to make themselves look better! It's sickening, but true! Jesus has no desire to participate in their stupid little game, instead he uses the opportunity to turn the tables against the accusers. How's it feel when your sins are put on display? No one deserves that , and furthermore it does absolutely no good for anyone! 

But my favorite part of the story is Jesus' response to the woman... "Neither do I condemn you; go and from now on, sin no more!" He has no interest in telling her what she has done wrong. She already knows that. Instead he is there to offer forgiveness and comfort! He is there to embrace her! But notice, he doesn't just stand around and tolerate her continuing to sin. He clearly tells her to change her ways! He just knows how to deal with his children in a loving manner that the modern day church has seemed to forget completely!

I'm not going to get into them right now, but I could point out dozens of similar examples throughout scripture (The parable of the Prodigal Son, His many times of forgiving David's mishaps, etc.). So where did we get so mixed up in our view of "Christianity"?  And how do we fix it?

God doesn't expect perfection, in fact he knows its impossible for us to achieve! He just wants us to strive to be like Him! And no matter how many times we mess up, he'll embrace us and welcome us home again! That's not to say there are never consequences for our actions, but that's another post for another time!

So where do we begin to change this? We change our perspective and we strive to let everyone around us see the love of Christ through us! The best way for us to do this is to study who Christ really was and how he interacted with people. He didn't always see eye to eye with the leaders of the church. In fact, they called him "a glutton, a drunkard, and a friend of sinners!" He spent his days among the people the "Christians" were too disgusted to bother with! There isn't a single person on this earth that Christ didn't give his life for. Think about it, Christ not only spent his time among sinners, he DIED to make sure they could be saved! He sacrificed everything imaginable for each and every one of us and there is nothing we could ever do to change that! 

Think about your own life, do you spend your days trying to show everyone you meet how much they are truly valued by Christ? Or do you spend your life being Thankful that Christ died for you, and thankful that you don't have a "messed up life" like this person or that person... Which one of the above scenarios would Christ want us to live like?

The only way we will ever see a change to the "hypocritical Christian" view we have been given, is to change ourselves and do everything we can to let others see what being a Christ follower is truly meant to be!

I hate using the word "Christian" to describe my relationship with Christ because it is used so loosely! So instead, I strive to be a "Christ Follower"! 

Would you rather live your life as a "Christian" or a "Christ Follower"?? I've made my choice, it's time to make yours!!!